Saying what you need to say for cathartic causes are fine, but only do it once.  You do it the second time, you're fucked.   There is a valid explanation to this theory, but it's only comes from experience.  It's indescribable, but it certainly is unavoidable.

It's not THAT bad. It's not even bad at all.

At first, I thought that having classmates that were out of my age group would hinder me socially.

Quite the contrary. I love it.



A huge part of my personality lies on the fact that I like to listen to what people say, or I let people take over a conversation because I'd rather learn about them rather tahn the other way around.



People who are older than I am have more wisdom and knowledge, and it is so exciting to hear when they ask any kind of question because not only it broadens their seemingly wide knowledge of the topic, it broadens mine as well. Because of this kind of education, I'm actually learning from my peers as well as from my professors, which is a double whammy.



Another good part of having classmates that are over 21, or have gone through the industry is that they have a lot of stories to tell. I'm not going to lie: I sat with five people who are in the category I just mentioned, and I just listened the whole time (while taking pictures of food when necessary) about their life stories, pranks, etcetera.



In the end, people are just people and relationships can form at anytime and anywhere.



Welcome to college.

So it takes me three days of orientation to figure out that I'm too much of a one dimensional person.

It's a great experience to meet people, but to hold a conversation with them is a burden for me, considering I never kept up with trends such as Aqua Teen Hunger Force (among other things).

One can say that by the end of the previous two paragraphs that if I did try my hardest to keep up with these trends, I'm compensating my character to gain friends while losing parts of what makes me the person that I am now.

Anyways, my main point in this paragraph being one-dimensional in a college community sucks.

Another thought: while it's nice to have all this previous knowledge from watching competitions and working eight months, it kind of intimidates me a bit to start fresh.  Some people I've talked to have failed a class or two, and most of the people that I'm talking to now are in the same boat as me, starting anew thus I don't know what to expect.

While a competitive edge is required, a little humility goes a long way.  Following instructions, and all.  But then it's also making mistakes and learning from them.

I guess these words for now are empty until I actually start experiencing them.

I'm out.

Straight Up, but not Paula Abdul's.

Once upon a blog, I said that I'll be damned if I wasn't typing my later blogs in Hudson Hall in Culinary Institute of America, NY.




Here I am.



As of this moment, I don't know what to feel. I should be ecstatic. I'm here, and I made it. On the other hand, I'm concerned about the condition of my mother who admitted that she was scared to go home by herself. Murphy's law, really. I feel like it's 2003 again where I shed a couple of tears when she left me, but I was good after the next day. I do believe though that with a little belief in the man upstairs in the form of prayer that she gets home safely, it'll happen and I'll have the time of my life here, as I already am before this thought came out of left field.



What I'm looking forward to the most in college is change by being away and having my beliefs tested and corrected by my colleauges. The irony in this is that the structure of beliefs that I've held in eighteen years (eighteen years, she got one of your kids, got him for eighteen years). Jokes aside, this belief structure will be tattered and tested by time, and rest assured that everything should be fine.



Now that I have taken out all this hi-lo (sounds like a laxative) out of my system, I'm thinking about skipping breakfast tomorrow because the flyer said it's optional.



And with that, I'm out.

Hi-Lo.

Today's the first of the month which means that the cover count for lunch today at the restaurant is below average.  I don't know the average though, but it has that laid back atmosphere to it.

Leaving work tomorrow, I've noticed that despite eight months of being in the industry that it doesn't make me impeccable, rather it covers my flaws to a degree and adds a lot more to my arsenal of knowledge and networking, if anything.

It somewhat burns me to have a memory lapse especially on things that I do know about.  For instance, throwing trim away was a really bad idea and I didn't need a second lecture on it because it was already ingrained in my common sense, except that it didn't bother to act up during that period of time.

Yes, it was somewhat a blow to my confidence and my knowledge simultaneously.  However, life goes on and I get up and try to forget about it, and I'm only typing it out here cathartically(is that even a word?) with piss poor grammar because I'm trying to eliminate often using commas and I don't know how to use a semicolon.  FML.

Enough with the negativity, however.

I cooked today for my boss, and he said that he liked it.   I'm happy with that considering with what I know, but I have yet to cook for the General Manager (which will likely go down tomorrow and hopefully don't get killed on my last day.  I think it's gonna go down though.  I have faith on that.)

Chicken stock, shallots and garlic made a huge difference today in my recipe today compared to the one that I have down in my notebook.  That'll change.  Also, screw tenderloins and I need to learn how to sharpen my knives, or else I'm screwed.