Musical Chairs, and Time.

There is one concept in life that doesn't sit right with me:  Moving On.

It truly is a pain to watch someone enjoy something while I'm at home not doing that something that someone else is doing.  The worst part is that this "something" is a thing that I, or some of the people I knew wanted to do.

It is a mixture of emotions, really.  Happy that someone else got to experience what I once experienced, Sad that I only got to see it in pictures, Angry as to how it was all SIP, and how I couldn't see the people that I knew inside or out of Westchester once again.

The most ironic thing about this though, is that I wanted for this to happen.  I said before (and I'm pretty sure that every person graduating has) is that we just want high school to be over.  It is finally getting over, as we are going through the last stages of April, then in a matter of days, it's the AP test.  After that's done, what's next?

The irony in our wishes or things that we say is far too general that is merely a basic idea, something that we can all agree upon.  Once that this "wish" actually goes by, there is a certain part that you don't want to leave:  A high school relationship, your starting spot on a sports team, or that one club you joined a year later because you were too fucking lazy, or intimidated to ask.

(That above obviously involves me, minus the relationship - like a legit one, not friendships, not that I don't want them, it's just time for something new.)

As much as I hate to say it, the concept of moving on is much like an ugly chick walking by that when given a makeover, it blossoms into something beautiful, something that you'd want to have sex with or simply "fap" to.  (Perhaps, that's just me, but other guys can agree to such a statement).  I am not alone in this experience, but this is pretty much the same feeling that I had after leaving my hometown.  It probably doesn't sit right with me right now, but as the days go by, some things will come to form, and some of these things might surprise ourselves, and one day, this surprise might bring you back once again to that someone or something that you once loved.

DC0419091145PM

Musical Chairs, and Time.

There is one concept in life that doesn't sit right with me:  Moving On.

It truly is a pain to watch someone enjoy something while I'm at home not doing that something that someone else is doing.  The worst part is that this "something" is a thing that I, or some of the people I knew wanted to do.

It is a mixture of emotions, really.  Happy that someone else got to experience what I once experienced, Sad that I only got to see it in pictures, Angry as to how it was all SIP, and how I couldn't see the people that I knew inside or out of Westchester once again.

The most ironic thing about this though, is that I wanted for this to happen.  I said before (and I'm pretty sure that every person graduating has) is that we just want high school to be over.  It is finally getting over, as we are going through the last stages of April, then in a matter of days, it's the AP test.  After that's done, what's next?

The irony in our wishes or things that we say is far too general that is merely a basic idea, something that we can all agree upon.  Once that this "wish" actually goes by, there is a certain part that you don't want to leave:  A high school relationship, your starting spot on a sports team, or that one club you joined a year later because you were too fucking lazy, or intimidated to ask.

(That above obviously involves me, minus the relationship - like a legit one, not friendships, not that I don't want them, it's just time for something new.)

As much as I hate to say it, the concept of moving on is much like an ugly chick walking by that when given a makeover, it blossoms into something beautiful, something that you'd want to have sex with or simply "fap" to.  (Perhaps, that's just me, but other guys can agree to such a statement).  I am not alone in this experience, but this is pretty much the same feeling that I had after leaving my hometown.  It probably doesn't sit right with me right now, but as the days go by, some things will come to form, and some of these things might surprise ourselves, and one day, this surprise might bring you back once again to that someone or something that you once loved.

DC0419091145PM

The Birthday Analogy

There is that one feeling prior to my birthday that I really get excited about:  The idea that I'm one year closer to be able to drink, to vote, to drive by myself, etc, or simply one year closer to death, or one year closer to independency, to success, to party.

Then, the event comes.  You get that magic number, you've had your moments, and then the next day, it feels like nothing happened, as if it was a normal day.

That is pretty much what I'm feeling at this point.  I don't even know how the hype for a certain event came to form, or why it was even brought up.  I'm not going to lie and say that I didn't want to go through with it, but I guess due to some tradition that has lasted for centuries, I guess I had to.

This is how bad it is to have so much thought swimming around in my head.  I don't know what to say, or I don't know whether to be straightforward or vague.  

Probably, it's because of this birthday analogy of getting gifts.  I guess that perfectly suits my point quite well.

If I wanted a car, and knowing me, being a teenager and my mom being a cheap, insurance agent, I'm pretty confident that I'm going to get the shitty old car with carpets that smell like cat piss, and an exterior that has possibly been scratched by cats. 

Then, on my birthday, I get a car that is brand new.  Leather interior, leather everything, GPS, bling on the rims, a sick sound system.... It's like, "What the hell did I fucking do to get this?", Where's the one that I expected to get?  

I still can't believe that life gave me the car that I didn't expect to get.  I mean I did want it before, but I've gone to accept the fact that I wasn't getting the shiny car.  Hell, I've accepted it that I told myself that I wasn't going to buy a car, and instead get a moped - something totally different from a car.

But now, I don't even know.  Do I return the car, or do I run away with it and have a joyride?

A New Leaf.

I realized something:  I cannot kill this blog.

I've made attempts to make a fresh start by at least attempting to make a new blog with no posts in it.  I've used titles such as "Like Dude, Seriously", "Dan-dified", or "For Everyone's Eyes Only".

Thinking of titles for the new blog got really stressful that I didn't even have the time to write the blog that I was planning to write itself.  I was also thinking about transferring all my better stuff into the new blog site.

I thought about it a couple minutes back and said:

"Man, all I need to do is to delete a couple of blogs, and change the title of the blog!"

So I did.

Even though this blog is for everyone's eyes only, It seems rather unoriginal as I took it from "For Stevie Wonder's Eyes Only", a song from Bring Me The Horizon.  That, and if I publish a blog for everyone in the world to read, then it truly is a given or else, I would go through the trouble of limiting it to a certain amount of readers, which probably won't even read it.

That, and I thought about the deleting thing, and I think that I'm not going to delete any of my past blogs, except for a draft here and there, as well as that notification of me making a new blog, since it's obviously bogus.  That, and every artist has had crappy work (except they're obviously in the ruins or stashed somewhere, who knows)

With college basketball season over, and the baseball season just starting, I think it's appropriate to say that the title for this blog is....

(look above. :])