Maturing like wine. Fine Wine.

"A mature person is one who does not think only in absolutes, who is able to be objective when deeply stirred emotionally, who has learned that there is both good and bad in all people and all things, and who walks humbly and deals charitably"

- Eleanor Roosevelt

--------------------

I believe that maturity is not a measure of age. Maturity is a measure of deeds done by people.

There is no one to be put up in the spot here, as all of us claim we are mature, and we as well have our tendencies to be immature.

Who doesn't?

I believed in the past that being eighteen is the real switch for maturity. Like a light, you flip the switch, it just stays on forever.

Apparently, it didn't turn that way.

I still acted the same seventeen year old that I was, saying things without thinking about it.

Now that I think about it, I really do think that it's better for my parents to correct me rather than my friends, or two of them for the matter.

My mother always told me to watch my mouth. I do, but there comes a time and a place for everything. Maybe one of the THREE (not two, realizing) said that there was a time and a place for me to talk, and maybe it's nowhere. This person, I'll partially believe, because some things that I say are totally irrelevant to the subject. The reason why I partially do not believe this person is because that I know I can talk anywhere I want to (which is a total given for anyone, considering it is a right and not a privilege), except I just have to find the right time to do so.

As I am typing this, I slowly am realizing things, and I'm actually happy that I am doing so, only because.

Okay, I'm losing focus.

The reason that I do things that I do is that I never know what impression I throw to people. Well, for the most part I don't, and this is where two of the three people who criticized me low-key for immaturity connect together.

One person said that I was a total idiot at spring conference. As much as I stand behind my delegation and some people that Spring Conference is a laid back version of YnG, it is also the VERY VERY first impression that people get from joining YnG. It's pretty much like an appetizer at your very first elegant restaurant, where appetizers can be as expensive as a main course at Chili's. With that said, what am I looking up there like an idiot, throwing legitimate, yet stupid allusions to Bob Ewell, or a bloodbath? Is this the impression that I want people to see? 

Apparently not.

With that said, I'll follow a thirty second rule that another friend has told me to do. Maybe it is a truly good advice to receive at this point of time before going to BOB 1, considering that it would be bigger than spring conference. With that advice, I probably could say a lot of things way better, and I wont be perceived as an idiot.

This would be my last words for now, as I am surrounded by noise, and that really does irk me.

A Crazy Bad Letter

I will be copying this word per word as I wrote it in English Class.

----------------------------------------------

What totally ticks me off these days is that people cannot be opinionated.  Sure, being opinionated might come off to some as being rude, but that is the hidden agenda of being such a person.

I personally do not know what kind of impression that I throw at people.  I don't try very hard to fit in, as I am just myself.  Being myself and knowing myself in the process in my four years of high school has found me the people that I truly want to hang out with.  Through these people, I learn various things, usually in the area of politics, or that of being an asshole.  If I do let out that first impression, then I let people lean with it and rock with it.  If people don't like me because of that sole impression, then you won't like me overall as a person, since you automatically judged me that way, not giving me a second or a third chance to at least redeem myself, or starting over with a clean slate.

Speaking of clean slates, I have moved on from the past.  Well, the bad part of my past at least.  With that said, I have been trying and trying to start a new one with you, but apparently I don not get that chance because you continually hang out with pricks like that moor, or that blonde who claims herself attractive, but can't hold a candle of dignity or self esteem to Lamont.

Yes, I said it, and go ahead and let her read this as well if you want to.  I'd rather know someone who has pride on his burnt chicken rather than knowing someone who has a pretty face, and no personality or self esteem to back it up with.

Speaking of rude once again, I don't know how the hell have I have been rude to you for this last week.  Hell, I have not had a connection with you for the longest time, but goddammit, whenever I make a joke, it should not make me rude (aside from the Jewish ones of course, but I know my limits).  As i said before, I am an opinionated kid who does not take sides.  If I ever picked between Hassan over you on a debate, it would be because has a better point than you did.  Besides, why would I be biased?  I've known the two of you for four years now and I know we as a cohesive unit could take over the school and start a revolution.  

Okay, I'm losing focus.

Continually speaking of rude, you are way more rude than I am, despite my tendencies to be immature.  Tell you this much: you do not have to avoid me at all, which apparently you have been doing for the past several years now.  You also come off as that, with the part of the crowd that you hang out with, along with your incessant complaints of your shitty life.  Your complaints in my world can be solved with a turn of a wrench.  You want a shitty problem?  Live the three years before I left the Philippines for the States.  That is a problem.

I'll end this note in a not so positive tone.  Once again, I am reiterating the fact that I regret as to what happened to the past between us, and some may know what it is.  HIgh school does not change or should not change people in a negative way, but sadly for you, it did.  With that, I'm going to say that I regret wasting my time knowing you, or for that matter, liking you.